Drug intake today: 2g kratom, cannabis, nicotine.
What I know:
What is kratom? Kratom is a plant. It grows in Southeast Asia. There are a few different strains. That's all I know scientifically about it.
How to I get it? I get it online and it's actually really cheap if you keep your use to a few grams a day. It's also available at almost every head shop, tobacco shop, and even corner stores. Ends up being about a dollar or two per dose.
How do you use it? The leaves are already crushed to power like form similar to a fine coffee grind. I always weigh (sometimes don't have a scale and I have to eyeball it) it so I know what my dose is exactly. I add it to warm or hot water and take it like a shot of whisky. It's pretty bitter so I chase it always with water. It's actually always unpleasant to dose this way.
Sometime's I'll purchase kratom in capsules which is nice because you don't have to use a scale or even taste the kratom. I currently dose 2 grams 3-4 times a day every 4 hours or so. Ends up being about a dollar or two per dose.
Why do I use it? I was on a 1&1/2gram a day heroin habit a bit over a month ago. I started kratom about 15 days after my last use of heroin. The point that I was at on days 15-17 was dangerous. If it wasn't for kratom that day I may have went back to heroin. I will never know but what I do know is that kratom saved me that day. It was a miracle. You can read about it here.
When did you start it? I started 3 weeks ago dosing 5-6 grams 4 times a day so it's been a pretty quick taper going from 20 grams to 6 a day. On day 15 the day I took it I was going through a quick taper withdrawal of suboxone. I used the suboxone to help with the hard heroin withdrawal but I stopped the subs after the 8th day. I was in so much depression and pain with no sleep when I arrived at my office on that 15th day. In the drawer was over 2 grams of quality east coast heroin and also a few bags of kratom. I saved the heroin just in case of "emergency" during my withdrawal. (I left it at the office so I wouldn't be around it the first 2 weeks)
I had a choice to make. And I chose kratom and flushed the heroin. My love affair was over.
What it does: Kratom feels like a very mellow mood lift but it brings with it a boost of energy and a very warm sensation in your stomach. It's probably the closest you'll get to any opiate feeling without using opiates.
Is it bad? Yes, the side effects I get come about 6 hours to 12 hours after my last use. They include muscle aches, sour stomach, tiredness, and irritablity. I have also been waking up and having to dose at like 4am to go back to bed. It was more difficult with the larger doses but now that I've tapered it's less an issue. Any cravings I have for drugs are now put on kratom. It's a totally different craving though compared to opiates or stimulates.
Is it good? Yes. The ability that kratom gives me to be off of opiates without a craving for them is a Godsend. It also gives you the freedom to stay fully legal without breaking the law. Just those 2 reasons alone give it more advantages than disadvantages at this point in my existence.
I'm considering prolonging my taper on kratom to take my time during these 90 days and take this slow and steady. I'm going to slowly move to one gram, then skip days, then finish. The advantages outweigh the disadvantages at this point.
You see, heroin addiction isn't a funny game we play. It's truly a life or death situation. As heroin addicts we are the walking dead, it's not a tv show, it's real. Everyday that I was on heroin I was dying, closer and closer to the grave I was sinking all the while drowning in my own personal hell. I barely escaped?
My God! I have a beautiful life to live.
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